I have seen so many comments in homeschool groups asking for advice on how to respond to this comment or that comment. Homeschool critics… we all have them in our lives.
Though the person who is saying it is different, the comments are generally the same. And everyone seems to want to know, “how do I respond?”
- Some will ask you, “what about socialization?” Just remind them of your teachers in school telling you “you are not here to socialize.”
- When they ask, “what is wrong with public school?” Tell them to turn on the news.
- “You don’t have a teaching degree”, “yeah well I don’t have a culinary degree either yet I feed my kids every day”, lol.
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The truth is, you cannot make someone see who is not willing to open their eyes. In other words, you are wasting your time responding. Now that is not to say that some of the above comments won’t help you get you through a social engagement or two, but my point is that there is no need wasting your time trying to convince someone else to see it your way. We cannot expect others to understand what God has placed in our hearts.
We don’t have to engage in every fight we are invited to. They will stop fighting you eventually when they see you are not going to reciprocate. Yes, at first it will probably enrage them, but just excuse yourself from the conversation. When they see you are not going to participate in the argument, they will get bored and move on. After all, it is no fun having a one sided fight.
I think sometimes these comments make us upset and want to quiet our critics because of our own insecurities. We were all raised in the same society that says a classroom is what socialization looks like. Even though I know that is not what I want it to look like for my kids. I sometimes feel like I can’t give them everything a school can give them, but in that worry, I forget what I CAN give them. I know that if they were in school there would just be a different list of worries and concerns. We just have to believe that this is what we were called to do, and they weren’t so they cannot understand.
Now I am not talking about someone disrespecting our children or putting them down. I am only referring to those passive aggressive comments that we all get about homeschooling. Though I have heard some say that when their relative starts quizzing their child, you should quiz them back with what you have been teaching in your homeschool.
My point is: you are not going to make them see your point of view. Save your energy for all the things God has called you to do.
I have found that in my homeschooling journey the more secure I have become with my choices and just stay focused on running my own race, the quieter my critics have become.
Jenna is a homeschooling mom to 3 amazing kids and a freelance writer. She has been homeschooling for 8 years and has taught every grade from preschool through 11th grade. She loves sharing tips for frugal living, homeschooling, and her heart over on her blog CenteredAtHome.com.
This Post Has 2 Comments
Melissa5 Aug 2017
The biggest I deal with is a fellow relative who home-schools. She doesn’t get why we do things different and has often said to me, “It’s okay if you don’t homeschool we would understand”. Ugh! She does more traditional while we lean more toward unschooling. It’s okay to do it differently!
Tiffany8 Aug 2017
It’s so crazy the things people criticize. The decision to Homeschool was hard enough, but being constantly hit with criticism is the worst… probably for just the reason you say. I am insecure. But I am also Trusting God